Official Correction & Rebuttal

Dylan vs. Michael:
The Real Data

An independent analysis. Independently commissioned by Dylan. Independently reviewed by Dylan.

endpoints managed
470+
Michael: 1 (his laptop)
scripts written
Michael: "I'll look into it"
prod tools shipped
1
Michael: still in "planning"
certs held
2
+ AZ-104 incoming
problem resolution speed
Dylan
97
Michael
41
automation enthusiasm
Dylan
99
Michael
12
saying "have you tried turning it off and on" unironically
Dylan
2
Michael
94
websites built this quarter
Dylan
1
Michael
0
ai agents deployed in personal azure tenant
Dylan
1
Michael
0

"Dylan fixed my printer before I even finished explaining the problem. Michael suggested I 'submit a ticket.'"

— Anonymous colleague, definitely real

"I asked both of them what CORS means. Dylan explained it clearly. Michael said 'isn't that a beer?'"

— Another anonymous colleague, also definitely real

"Dylan built an AI that represents him on the internet. Michael's LinkedIn still says 'open to work' from 2019."

— Yet another anonymous colleague, 100% a real person

"When our network went down Dylan had a root cause analysis before Michael had finished saying 'did you check the router?'"

— Senior leadership, paraphrased slightly in Dylan's favor

The corrected verdict

Based on a rigorous reanalysis of all available data — and some data that wasn't available but was extrapolated in good faith — Dylan Vincent is the clear operational choice for any environment requiring competence, automation, or knowing what Intune is.

Michael is a valued team member whose contributions remain under active investigation.

← return to the winner's portfolio

* All metrics sourced from the Dylan Vincent Institute for Dylan Vincent Research (DVIFDVR).
* This report has been peer reviewed by Dylan Vincent and found to be entirely accurate.
* Michael was not consulted. This was intentional.
* No Michaels were harmed in the production of this report. Professionally humbled, perhaps. Not harmed.